1. What is your favorite Little Debbie snack? If you hate Little Debbie then I bow down to your greatness. (I suppose you can include some other favorite snack. Maybe it'll inspire me to get over LD for today.)

When I was a kid in elementary school in Northern Idaho….near a lot of lead smelters and cyanide leech ponds…there was a girl in third grade for 3 years running named Little Debbie. She was really small but really mean.  She hated being called Little Debbie, but there were at least 6 other Debbies in her class at all times. In Northern Idaho in the 70's children were always named either Debbie or Raymond. It was what you put in FRONT of the name that counted. She wanted to be Pretty Debbie, but that wasn't happening.  She had like 6 hairs on her head and small eyes that looked like twin portals to an unflushed hell.

When you'd address Little Debbie, she'd do this thing with her teeth against her lower lip and then she'd scratch whoever was sitting next to her.  A Somoan kid in our class (Brown Debbie) said it was because her mother had sex with a weasel when she was pregnant with Little Debbie.  That sounded reasonable at the time.  Little Debbie's mom was never seen outside of her car, a beat to shit trans-am with a gold eagle on the hood, but no front panels.

That car was everywhere.  Like a reminder to not have sex with weasels. Little Debbies brother PeePants Raymond had to push the car while their mother popped the clutch.  Probably not unlike what happened with L. Debbie's conception. 

ANYWAY:  They lived in a converted quansit hut…and when I say 'converted' …I mean WHAT THE ALUMINUM FUCK IS A QUANSIT HUT?

And how did a Samoan kid get to Northern Idaho?

Anyhow, Little Debbie's favorite snack was chalk.

2. What do you use for laundry detergent?  While YOUR answer, Laura, was clever and showed a sincere appreciation of thriftiness and our Environment….most of the rest of us shouldn't even BOTHER answering this question.   Except that I hand scrub everything with recycled homemade soap.  I don't even rinse, because that is wasteful and expensive. AND I just wear my frothy almost-clean clothing wet.

3. Tighty Whities or Boxers? (this, obviously, is open for interpretation)  I detest cheapness in anyone of any color.  I love a guy who can take a punch to the face repeatedly for money because it's so useful.  I mean…there's a job skill, right? We shouldn't pay them with real money though; play cash or snack cake currency would do just fine. They are too stupid to know the difference.

4. Dogs: On the bed? In the house? On the furniture? Never? What are your rules?

Depends on the dog.  I have a little too much and too many going on right now. 

5. Favorite dog-related website (aside from my blog, obviously har har har)? Favorite NON-dog related website? Can be blogs, or whatever.

I have a LOT of favorites, dog and non-dog.  Dog related: Aside from Crooks and Crazies, I think Jorgen is hilarious and I like his writing.  Jenny does a good job on the Alta-Pete blogs…I love Lora WIthnell… I hit the Sheepdog News periodically.  And there are many others I cycle through regularly.  All good.  Cannot possibly name them all.

NON-DOG – I am a news junkie so I read NY Times online, and Talkingpointsmemo is FANFUCKINGTASTIC for political news….my daughter writes for Seattles alt weekly The Stranger so I read their 'slog' regularly.  I get twitter feeds of sciencenews and harpers.  I LOVE http://www.marriedtothesea.com for a morning laugh.