…Sometimes I feel like I SHOULD post on something, because its expected by my *3* estimated regular readers…but in the end I just can't think of anything new or interesting to say about it, and, anyway anyone who really cares will call me tomorrow. Suffice it to say that a) Derek was helpful, and entertaining, as always, and I had a good time running Jen through the Ranch course today….It was worth $25 to me, but I'm not sure about Derek, driving that aged Chevy? pickup 30 or so hard-lived miles from Old New Plymouth for just ME…
because I was his only student. Rhonda cancelled and…
b) A** predictably flaked, yet again…Does she ever show up? Is she just FUCKING WITH US? I don't care if she reads my blog, or someone quotes me here because, frankly, I don't give a crispy fisting what your other certifiable reasons for being a Chronic might be – quit being so habitually rude. You can be lazy or drunk or eye-warbling mad like many of my friends; you can rock like a 30 week fetus in crazy fluid, jabber in tongues and lick Janie's t-posts…you can medicate yourself until the only thing behind those beady brown eyes is thorazine and whatever else you had for breakfast but if you're well enough to say you'll be somewhere you are well enough to fucking be there. ONE TIME. ONE FUCKING TIME. No excuses.
Nice, huh? I like A**. She's one of my 46th or 59th closest friends. Really. I plan to name a cat after her someday. I'm not mean, I just have a nice deficiency.
While I'm on a rampage here are some other things that irritate me:
"It is what it is…." – While that may have been refreshingly succinct the first time it fell on human ears, it is now so overused and pumped full of banal as to actually hurt my cringing gland when I hear it an estimated 10 – 100 times daily by those who just lack the imagination or verbal skills to say WHAT IT REALLY ACTUALLY IS OR ISN'T. NEVER USE THIS EXPRESSION AGAIN. IT IS WHAT IT ISN'T, ACTUALLY. IT ISN'T SAYING ANYTHING. Try just shrugging. Or licking something inanimate.
Renee Zellweger – I watched a sort of documentary series called 'Iconoclasts' this weekend, a Sundance channel production that "pairs two creative visionaries who discuss their lives, influences, and art." The episode I saw had my favorite Christiane Amanpour with the worst actress ever — Renee Z. So we have Christiane eloquently describing how she has for the last 20 years traveled with CNN to cover war, and death, and famine ..why it is a moral imperative of people in her position to reveal a dark inhumane or awful truth in a a way that inspires others to feel a responsibility towards changing it. Renee would interrupt with such insightful remarks as,
"I know! RIGHT? Cause they are really poor! It makes me sad!" and,
"Where are some pretty places you've visited?"
"I was going to be a journalist, too! I can't remember why I didn't be one…."
Okay. I'm paraphrasing, but its not far from the mark. I was a little disappointed that Amanpour didn't gut punch Zellweger mid-way through the hour episode. Or just ask her to show the camera men her wan little teats and then get the hell out of there. Where was the creative vision in letting that skinny little latex vole prattle on about moisturizer for Darfur? I kept waiting for Christiane to offer a solution for vapid hollywood actresses earning enough during that interview alone to feed several of her recently visited refugee camps for a year….but it never happened. Single tear. DIsappointment.
I'll probably delete this tomorrow. This has become one of my favorite things to do.
UPDATE: I deided not to delete this because it felt cowardly. I did delete A's consonants, though. I stripped her of them. My policy in general is to not write about anyone I know or have met unless I ask first. Usually. UNLESS I don't like them or they piss me off. Half the people I know, at the least, don't even know I have a blog(s). Its a wide grey line alright.