My flight is delayed at least an hour, so far. Which means I have nothing to do but drink in the airport bar and watch this older business guy try his goofy best to pick up on his co-worker, a cute but dumpy girl half his age. She's wearing children's shoes but she has a weary face. He looks like an animated tomato. So far he's braying and throwing out wildly inappropriate responses to every blan thing she says,
"I think it would help if the lab personnel would review their manual direction for blah blah blah"
"OH TRACY YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT!" HEE HAW HEE HAW
He's working his tired routine and she seems confused by it, at best. My favorite moment came when she had to hoist her own cartoonishly huge suitcase onto the security belt while he watched, prattling platitudes about how dangerous and edgy she was in guessing that the meeting was going to go long. She hoped they'd get an hour for lunch "this time"….
"TRACY, YOU ARE GOING TO CHANGE OUR WORLD IF YOU AREN'T CAREFUL" HEE HAW HEE HAW
She's wrestling this thing big enough to hold his body, chopped neatly in half, and he is still thinking he can score with such old timey favorites as,
"Oh My Lord, Tracy, we are going to be a TEAM, ALRIGHT!" HEE HAW HEE HAW
She grunts and struggles and he's staring at her poor prime birthing hips. Yeah.
So now we're in the bar, which is filling up, probably with other disgruntled SLC travelers. They've ordered drinks and he says,
"Put that on two separate checks."
It's all happening here.